Having Tough Conversations About Ourselves

Why is it that when we've got such deeply compelling factual proof regarding males in areas like sexual assault, loneliness and relationships, psychological health, and gun violence that there's nonetheless such push-back if you say, “Let’s have a conversation about these features of masculinity.”

Virtually immediately, the whole conversation is derailed by people saying “You’re saying masculinity is dangerous!” or “You’re saying males are dangerous!” or “Why are you saying I’m dangerous!”

No one is saying any of that.

What we are saying is that the best way we socialize boys and males and the best way we enforce and re-enforce the norms of the anticipated and accepted male conduct in our culture and society are problematic.

Our culture has rooted within it a very slender prescription of what “masculinity” is – domination, toughness, isolation, sexual conquest. And that's deeply dangerous to men and boys and by extension to ladies and women.

The extra we will undo this, the better off all of us are.

But so as to do this, we now have to be able to speak about it with out shutting down.

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Photograph Credit: Anthony Easton/Flickr Creative Commons (Attribution License)

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